Waxing

It has been a while since I wrote something other than random pieces of poetry. Which is weird I have not really felt the need to write, and if I started writing something randomly for no reason at all well. Does not feel right does it?

The other reason why I do not seem to be writing a lot is because I always get the best ideas just before I got to sleep. Which just because I really am finding it difficult to get to sleep I just say well ill write about it tomorrow.

Tomorrow never comes, sooooo last night I just went a head and made an alarm and just now it went off and hence here I am writing.

The title well, I was thinking why we keep enduing small amounts of painful things or uncomfortable things for a long period of time rather than get it done and over with. Where am I going with this? I mean I am currently spending days trig to find some form of motivation to study or get material in my head but it takes ages for me to even start focusing and let alone the effort which it takes for me to keep focused.

The thing is if I get it done and over with I feel amazing, I can then relax and have, you know the rest of the day free.

Taking an other example it is really funny, I mean we all went there, having that person or those people in your life. That habit, or thing which you know is not making you happy but you go, but if I am with out it I am worse of.

Truth be told you will be better off and you know it. You will be better off if you do a little bit of training every day. You will hold yourself from that extra bar of chocolate, see the doctor. Or simply break it off with that person who has been draining your energy or emotions.

The question which is really puzzling me and that I do not know why, myself included that is, why do we keep hanging on to false hope, to that thread of sometimes imagination.

That it will get better.

Experience has more often than not showed us other wise, yet we keep on believing that something will turn right if we try hard enough. The very definition of insanity, is doing the same thing over and over against expecting a different result.

Perhaps, but what I think I have been doing wrong, just though of it while writing this, man I really should write more its therapeutic almost. Side tracked.

WHAT if we do the same thing, just slightly differently, work in a different way do the things we want, painful, annoying or those that slow us down, just so slightly differently. Maybe hey the only factor you needed to change was maybe how you see exams. Or changing the subject rather than working your way though the last bit of work in a false attemept or strike at hope to be able to reach the end.

In the end it is all perception.

Music

It burns,

it cries

Yelling

Screaming

Moaning

Crying

Laughing

Dancing

Its cold

yet hot

passion

dead

empty

full

alive or dead

no one knows, its a song

a track, a soul

a piece of imagination

a string of sounds

placed one after an other, dancing together in a matrix of

matter

moving

up

down

sideways

left

right

right and left

yet these sounds,

these movements

we listen to,

reverberating into the abyss that is space,

ending, when nothing starts

a complex mesh of memories

we strang together

so we can remind ourselves of times past

of times to happen

or just simply

that we are indeed alive.

The curb

I was sitting,
bathing in the cold moon light.

The street lamps damping the light
fresh and cold
emotionless
flooding the streets around me.

Yet I was sitting there,
smoking my cigarette,
sipping my beer.

The children were talking,
playing behind me

the streets were filled with their
laughter
the thud of the ball
hitting bouncing

I still sat,
in a world of my own
ignoring the reality

building around me
what I wanted comfort.

as I waited for the onslaught
of my inner daemons to hit
a wall
hit me.

They came
my troubles

my daily deeds,
my daily troubles,
my work,
my studies,

but at that moment
the world stood still

but for the smoke rising from
my cigarette but
and the crumpled beer can falling

in the bin

the world stood still
and  I could get back up
from

my moment of isolation
my moment to myself

I was ready to get back at it.

Rain

Heavy... Pressure... Beating, holding down. Holding your breath, Remembering the day I first jumped Feeling the anticipation Feeling the air rush by So slow So fast Breathing Holding Ice Cold Water Moving around, enveloping You sink Deeper Deeper You start losing Breath Air Stop Swift Strokes Open Eye Burning pain You see the light though a haze of red and blue You move Running out of air. Till the surface is Broken Yet I am Dry How am I still drowning?

Arts Festival!

This is something that I do not usually do, since I have a tendency to write after something has happened, and give a full recount of what is happening then this happened.

My nose led me to what I believed to be Chicken wings, do not judge me! However I found much much more, there was everything, music, food, CAKES! Yet the best thing of all was not these things was the fact that there was such a warm atmosphere, a hustle and bustle that is rarely seen at the University of Malta.

THEN all over you can find a large number of items, pieces of art, clothing and many small treats (the cakes tempted me a slight bit to much). Go explore and tell me what you think of this experience, which comes from when a large number of student organisations are able to get together and work for a common aim as seen by the large number of organisations who joined in this event.  (JEF, DESA, TDM2000, ASCS, HOASA and USPA.)

Take this chance to bask a bit in the last dregs of sun before winter fully sets in and we are all coped up inside studying for our exams, so let us enjoy our days at university and get some good Christmas Cheer on!

For more details look up the Facebook event, this is going on till tonight late.

Facebook Event: Found Here